Kevin:
Kevin Jakson traced a raindrop down the inside of the window pane with a well manicured fingernail. It had been a rough day at work and he was homesick. He had left Massachusetts 5 months earlier to follow a dream to San Francisco and now he wondered if he had thought the whole thing completely through. Boston had been home for 2 years and he had a lot of friends there. San Francisco was proving to be harder than it should be. Of course before Boston, it had been Dallas and before that Denver, followed by Kansas City. It was not that he was a drifter, it was just that his jobs became boring after a time and a change of scenery was in order. But San Francisco should have been better. They had the largest gay population and programs and doctors to help him manage his HIV/AIDS, so why was he unhappy now.
Work was great and the staff he worked with in Alameda County were a bunch of caring people. The program was one he had wanted to oversee and was a challenge which helped bolster up his resume in case he ever decided to move to another hospital.
Then there was that little problem of home ownership. In Boston he had rented but he still had $150,000 in his escrow account from the sale of his home in Dallas. But this was California and that kind of money would not even make a good down payment on a home of any kind. So he contented him self with an apartment on the second floor of a complex 45 minutes from the hospital where he worked. The view was of the next row of apartments, but there was the little courtyard so it was not that bad. Usually any extra time would be spent on the trail running. Kevin liked to do at least 3 miles every day and the weekends were good for 7-10, but not in the rain. Rain was good for keeping him inside and being inside was depressing. It made him think too much. Like now.
His mind drifted back to Montana and a very lonely childhood. Mom tried, but mom did not understand the teenage boy struggling with his sexuality. Then along came Tommy. Tom was great, but by then he knew and there was no reason to talk it over with anyone. He was a freak who liked boys. Talk was cheap. Just how to keep mom from finding out now.
He remembered the move to Colorado. He tried to fit in at the high school, but found no acceptance until he joined the Drama Club. They were his kind of friends Eric and he really hit it off. He remembered the night of the Senior prom. He and Eric both had dates and after the dance they took them home. Then he and Eric had gone to the Nature Center to walk along the river. That was his first experience with a person, male or female and it was not an easy memory to recall. They wereboth new at this, but they knew what they wanted.
So long ago and far away. Now there were only fond memories of Eric and there would never be any more made. Eric had died in 1997 while Kevin was away at College. No one had told him. No one had told him how he suffered with the Pneumonia that is common in AIDS cases. He learned from his mom on Christmas break that Eric had died of cancer or some such thing. “ Did you know him well, honey?”
“No, mom, not real well.” Only as well as I knew myself and loved him with every fiber of my being, because he was just like me. But those were thoughts best kept to himself. Or they were until he had gone in for regular testing a year later and learned that love was not the only thing he shared with Eric.
He left the trail of the rain drop down the window and reached up to trace the tracks of his own tears. Today was not a good day. Would there ever be another good day in his life?
Oh, Eric!
Kevin Jakson traced a raindrop down the inside of the window pane with a well manicured fingernail. It had been a rough day at work and he was homesick. He had left Massachusetts 5 months earlier to follow a dream to San Francisco and now he wondered if he had thought the whole thing completely through. Boston had been home for 2 years and he had a lot of friends there. San Francisco was proving to be harder than it should be. Of course before Boston, it had been Dallas and before that Denver, followed by Kansas City. It was not that he was a drifter, it was just that his jobs became boring after a time and a change of scenery was in order. But San Francisco should have been better. They had the largest gay population and programs and doctors to help him manage his HIV/AIDS, so why was he unhappy now.
Work was great and the staff he worked with in Alameda County were a bunch of caring people. The program was one he had wanted to oversee and was a challenge which helped bolster up his resume in case he ever decided to move to another hospital.
Then there was that little problem of home ownership. In Boston he had rented but he still had $150,000 in his escrow account from the sale of his home in Dallas. But this was California and that kind of money would not even make a good down payment on a home of any kind. So he contented him self with an apartment on the second floor of a complex 45 minutes from the hospital where he worked. The view was of the next row of apartments, but there was the little courtyard so it was not that bad. Usually any extra time would be spent on the trail running. Kevin liked to do at least 3 miles every day and the weekends were good for 7-10, but not in the rain. Rain was good for keeping him inside and being inside was depressing. It made him think too much. Like now.
His mind drifted back to Montana and a very lonely childhood. Mom tried, but mom did not understand the teenage boy struggling with his sexuality. Then along came Tommy. Tom was great, but by then he knew and there was no reason to talk it over with anyone. He was a freak who liked boys. Talk was cheap. Just how to keep mom from finding out now.
He remembered the move to Colorado. He tried to fit in at the high school, but found no acceptance until he joined the Drama Club. They were his kind of friends Eric and he really hit it off. He remembered the night of the Senior prom. He and Eric both had dates and after the dance they took them home. Then he and Eric had gone to the Nature Center to walk along the river. That was his first experience with a person, male or female and it was not an easy memory to recall. They wereboth new at this, but they knew what they wanted.
So long ago and far away. Now there were only fond memories of Eric and there would never be any more made. Eric had died in 1997 while Kevin was away at College. No one had told him. No one had told him how he suffered with the Pneumonia that is common in AIDS cases. He learned from his mom on Christmas break that Eric had died of cancer or some such thing. “ Did you know him well, honey?”
“No, mom, not real well.” Only as well as I knew myself and loved him with every fiber of my being, because he was just like me. But those were thoughts best kept to himself. Or they were until he had gone in for regular testing a year later and learned that love was not the only thing he shared with Eric.
He left the trail of the rain drop down the window and reached up to trace the tracks of his own tears. Today was not a good day. Would there ever be another good day in his life?
Oh, Eric!
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