Professor of what?

Just in from Delilah.

Lou,
Now come on, you know me, have I ever paid for a date? Men have to pay to be with me, well that sounds a bit prostitutiony, I mean to spend time with me. I am a joy, just like you and we deserve only the best. I haven't dated in 2 years, by choice, you know my history of love em and leave em, but I think i'm ready now and I will never settle, I want the total package.
Anyway, the coffee date with the professsor. He wasn't bad looking, as a matter of fact I  was pleasantly surprised, he looked better then his pic. I have to admit I was terrified on the way to meeting him, it felt like I was going on a job interview, naked. So at first I was rambling like a fool and he did his best to put me at ease and then about 15 minutes into the date he looked right at my chest and said, " wow, nice, what size are they?" Ahh classy buddy, now I have the upper hand, and boy did he try to back track saying "oh man I am sorry, I have no filter, I have this terrible issue of saying everything I am thinking". he proceeded to give me example after example of all the times he had done just that. Now it was him that was nervous. No I never answered his question, I mean it would have been one thing if I was dressed provocatively but I had on jeans and a t-shirt for god's sake.
When we were leaving he asked if we were going to get together again and i said sure and he said I think that is a blow me off sure and I just kind of laughed. When I got home he had already sent me 2 emails.
Well I have to go get ready for my next date, we are meeting for dinner, wish me luck! Let you know how it went tomorrow.
=

I hope this girl is not seeking advice from me.  Right now I have six extra people here, I have lost my bed and I think I am coming down with a migraine.

Delilah;

So I sounds like that went well!  I have never interviewed naked.  May have ended up that way before it was over.....not really!  That is a lie.  A blantant lie.  Was this guy an honest to pete professor?  Now why would a man that smart need to advertise on the open market?  It must be harder to meet women or men than I thought.  So after a man lets it be known that he is checking you  out, isn't it sort of down hill from there? 
OMG! I wound up baby sitting with a one year old, a 17 month old and a 6 year old this afternoon.  Course the son is here and the girls came up from Kansas this afternoon.  So that is six extra and 3 more on the way.  When the son got here I told him I was sort of seeing someone and his response was "OH great!  Now there is an image, my geriatric mother is chasing  men."
Smart move, meeting for dinner.  Take your car and you have a ride home.  The hoards are hungry.  Good luck on tonight.

Lou

Oh, dear, methinks inflation has hit the online dating thing!

OK, the girl is churning them out now.  And this just amazes me....read it and then I will comment and answer her back.....

Ten bucks? Try thirty-five/month. Anyway, I spent the night on the phone and found out some interesting stuff. My bad, I guess something like 85% of people lie, they even post pics that aren't themselves and say they are 100lbs thinner then they really are or 10yrs younger. Can you believe that shit? I mean what the hell would you do when you actually showed up to meet someone? wouldn't that be humiliating? I am hearing the most hilarious stories. This one guy went to meet the girl at the movies and she had said her body was average and she could barely fit into the seat. Anyway, I have my first coffee date tonight.
So what's up your butt? Maybe you should get on this site with me and get some, they say its a good tension reliever.
Yes, all is the same here, nothing ever changes. It will be great to see you and I'll try to have some weeded out by the time you get here. I have 2 dinner dates lined up this weekend. I'll keep you updated!!!
=

Ok, let me just answer this one.  Then I will comment, unless something better comes along, which could be watching the neighbor man walk!

Delly, Delly,

You have got to be jerking me around! Thirty five dollars a month!  That is more than I spend on gas!  More than I spend on groceries.  For that kind of money they ought to deliver you a specimen drawn and quartered to the front door!  You are spending more than I make!

Now as for the chickies kind of embellishing things, I have been known to do that myself.  Nothing big mind you, just a little younger than I really am and maybe tell them my correct weight, but tell them I am 6 feet tall.  I am not fat, just short.  Course if one gets stuck in  a seat at the theater the guy is going to catch on pretty quick.  Course just look around, 60-70 pounds overweight is about average. LOL

So who is paying for this said coffee?  Independent Delilah or are you going to pull out the girlie card and make him do it?  Lot to be said for not letting him buy.  How much is coffee now days.  Used to be us girls were expected to give it up for a hamburger.  Women have come a long ways, but the men have yet to figure that out.

Just got an e from the boy and he will be here in 2 hours.  So much for the cleaning of the house.  Call me after your coffee tonight!  Curious minds want to know.  And you are not suggesting that I would benefit from a little male companionship?  For your own sake, I hope not!

Lou

Well, sorry, but if the boy is about to arrive I have got to get out of my jammies.  Will check in after the girl has her coffee.  If she makes it home.  If she makes it to the coffee shop.  Why is it if some one says, "Lou this is Homer" it is alright to go for coffee.  But if I pull one of the internet it is scary?  Not that I am interested in doing that myself. 

She is not dead, as I thought!

So today I got this from Delilah.

What is up with these men? The very first one I give my # to starts questioning me non-stop, are you sure that is your pic, when was it taken, what do you mean when you say you are curvy, like he is some damn prize. I finally got mad and took a picture of myself with no make-up and sent it to him and told him to bite me. Oh now he is trying to back track and apoligize. Are there still men with manners? =

Ok, so let me just answer this one.

D.  Oh for crying in a bucket!  You think you are going to sign up for this and pay $9.99  and you are going to get the cream of the crop?  You have got to be fresh off the turnip truck!  First you want a clean one, and now you think they should be polite?  You are probably damn lucky you found one that is breathing!

Now at what point are you going to actually speak with one of these drop dead gorgeous male species?  Oh, do I sound sarcastic?  So sorry.  As far as I am concerned this is one of your not so bright moves.  Are all these prime specimens in the K. C. area?  I am coming up there in the next month or so to see my friend, Shirley.  Hope you have one lined up for me to check out for you by then.  Oh, maybe one with a nice plumbers crack!

I should have had this talk with you earlier about getting what you pay for.  You can not even get a decent meal for under $10.00 and yet you expect to find a soul mate for that price.  Don't they have one where you could just like give them a pile of money and they run you through a computer and then it spits two of you out together?  That way you could maybe get a clean, well mannered one.

Oh, I am so tired tonight I can not think straight.  Still have a ton of crap to do which includes making the bed so I can get in it.  Other than this new habit of chasing men, what else is new.  Ellie still across the street?

Niters!  Lou

Things may be starting to kind of heat up online!

Got this from Delilah this evening.
Holy hell Lou, when I got up this morning, I got onto match and had 30some responses. Men can either wink at you or send you an email. What's really weird is that there are guys from other states and even out of the country, what the hell? Are there no women in CA, TX or the United Kingdom? Then I got some emails that got a little to intense for a first contact, how in the world could anyone talk about "our relationship" from a pic and a few words? A bit desperate, don't you think? But replying with a not interested seems a bit harsh so I think I'm just going to ignore those. Oh, oh, and how could I forget those guys who were in ripped, stained shirts drinking a beer with names like hammer time, stud man and trojan guy, need I say more?
So anyway, there were 3 that could be promising, i sent 2 email replys and winked at the other one. I really liked the ones that were funny and didn't take themselves to seriously. I don't know how to take the one's that didn't post a pic, do you think they are trying to hide something?
Well i guess we'll see what happens, it is all a bit daunting. I don't think I am going to make the first move by winking at a guy, I mean, rejection would suck. Will keep ya updated!!!
=
And I replied

Hey girl!  Looks like you may be onto something with this online crap!  Let's see now....we have the standard studly names, and the beer drinkers, dirty clothes and then the ones with no picture?  Are you seriously thinking about those?  If they have no picture it has to be because they are so drop dead gorgeous, you think?  Duh, NOT.  Probably got a third eye right in the middle of the forehead and all three of them are crossed!  I hope you are using a little bit of discretion.  Damn good chance they are the hairy guys hiding in the basement of the local prison getting ready to steal your identity.  Are you sure this is a smart move on your part?  I could surely dig you up something around here.  I know 3 or 4 guys that hold a little promise.  LOL

The wind came through here yesterday and melted my seven inches of snow, so now it is Lake Woe Begone!  Course when I went out to do chores this morning all that water had frozen and I practiced a little of the Swan Lake thing before I busted my keester.  Luckily the old hip held out.

Watch yourself with that dating thing.  There are degenerates out there.  Any kind of security that keeps you safe?

Write when you have time.  How is the new job?   Lou 

Oh, she finally decided to make a move.

Dear little Delilah has finally made a move.  or at least told me something.  I had about forgotten why I set up this blog.  So let us read her little email and see what we think:

Lou:
As you know, I haven't dated in 2 years, cause as you also know dating has been pretty much a nightmare for me. Commitment, I avoided like the plague, my trust in men had always been non existent. I mean come on, 6 engagements and I ran so fast from each one I even lost myself. So I took the time away and got myself together and I am finally ready to give it another whirl.
My friend at work, she's been on match.com for several months now and talked me into trying it. It just seems so cold, finding someone over the Internet. But nothing ventured, nothing gained. Right?
I just signed up and posted a pic. I didn't say a whole lot in my bio, cause frankly I didn't know what to say. Anyway, I'll definitely keep ya updated!!!
=

Hell, this sounds almost anti climactic.  I guess I don't know just what I thought might happen.  I thought she might have something going by now, but I guess it has only been a few days.  Well, now I wonder what happens?  She is going to have to give me more than this.  Just post your picture and that is it.  I could do that.  Well, I guess this is kind of like throwing your bait in the water.  Now set back and wait for a bite?  Gotta be honest here, I am  glad it is her and not me. 

Good luck girlie.  I got  feeling we are both going to be wiser pretty soon!  I think I will give her a call tomorrow, or do you think I am getting pushy.  Ah, the Internet!

Oh, this is to good to keep a secret!!

You all know that I am not really from Colorado and have been transplanted here from the Sunflower state of Kansas, right?  Having lived there for many years I have a plethora of friends back there.  I have several very good friends who confide in me and I in them.  Well, it just came to my attention that one of these friends has joined an online dating service.  That in itself is not even note worthy.  What is would be that I am privey to her private thoughts and I have been dieing to know what this whole business is about.

Now if I am curious, I figure some of you might also be, so............  Now I do not want to do this on my regular blog cause that is for other things.  This is going to be an in depth study into the twilight world of online dating.   Who knows, if this goes well, I may even have a fling at it, but first let's just throw old Delilah to the wolves!  Hey!  This is for science!  Now you should know that Delilah is not her real name.  And for her privacy I am taking an oath of silence, so beg as you will, I will not give the girl up for anything.  Number one, she is bigger than me and would rip my heart out and feed it to the hogs if I  did. 

So, I do not know exactly when this blog will begin, but I think rather soon.  My intent is to publish her little emails in their entirety, unless she uses nasty words.  And I would invite all of you to throw in your two cents worth.  I will leave a place down there for comments.  Or you can email me.  What ever.  I want this to be an interactive blog here, so lets get fired up.  This girl is desperate for a man and needs all the help she can get.  Give me tips to give her because her biological clock is running and it is ticking very fast.

Oh, this is going to be so much fun!!