Off to Beulah and coffee with Allan.

OK, you would have been so proud of me!  I showered and dressed for this little venture with a tad bit more care than I usually display.  Wore my black, clingy culottes and a white tee with a vee neck.  Now, let me refresh you on this coffee date.  Allan is a retired engineer who lives up in Beulah.  He is short at 5'5", but that is alright cause he likes to hike in the mountains, so I am sure he is fit.  So, off I went for my little adventure. 

I arrived a little early, because that is what I do.  I am always early and if I am not early it is because I forgot and will not be there!  So the Stompin' Grounds was empty when I got there.  Course Jan was all excited to see me.  And always one to kill two birds with one stone, I had brought a supply of Lotions to replenish my display that she keeps there to  sell.

So I was explaining about the online dating thing and she reminded me of my two previous men friends I had brought to meet her.  First was the big tall 6'2" over bearing Cossack.  I dated him a few months, but that is history.  Then there was the 6 foot widower who wanted nothing more than to take care of me.  Well, anyone who knows me knows who takes care of me!  I have it painted on a plank on my deck "Love Many, Trust Few.  Always paddle your own canoe!"

Ok, I had talked to this yahoo twice in the past week and we had made this date for 10:00 AM on Monday.  It was now 10:10 and no signs of Mr. Engineer.  Ok, give him a few.  Never mind that tardiness ranks right up there with slovenliness with me.  Finally at almost 10:45 the door opened and in walked Allan.  Had I not been so pissed by this time, I might have cut the boy some slack.  After all he was very compatible on paper.  Retired engineer who free lances in Denver.  Lives in my favorite mountain town in the whole world.  Financially secure.  Sorry, but the being late thing is just inconsiderate.  And had he given me a good reason, but he just blew it off like it was not important. 

So, his receding hairline went from receding to gone to hell.  Shiny pate!  Little bit heavy went to obese.  Scruffy little fellow went to down right unkempt!  And I think he stretched that 5'5" cause he sure looked little when I first saw him.  I remained seated so he would feel tall.  The fact that he was 10 years younger suddenly became very important and not in his favor at all.  And when he smiled I was lost.  Those were the most ill fitting dentures I have ever seen!  I thought they were  in upside down.  I actually felt sorry for him in that moment.  I knew this was one of those "get the hell out of here moments".  But he was a human being after all and I did not want to scar him for the next woman. 

In my defense I was my usual charming self.  He was fascinated with my candor and humor.  The slinky culottes and and the vee neck also held his attention.  I explained to him that I was a busy woman and his time slot had been spent with my waiting for him to show up.  Then I apologized that I had to cut our visit short but I had an appointment with the Doctor in the Springs because I was having brain surgery on Friday since the medication was no longer controlling my "problem".  I did tell him I would call him next week if I survived.  He seemed content with that.  He walked me to my care, I toodles the fingers at him and drove off into the sunset. 

So that was my first encounter.  In a couple days I will begin searching again.  Perhaps I can find someone in the Libra thing on the Astology chart.  You don't think I am too picky do you?  I sure hope not.  If it was not for this lobotomy lurking on the horizon I would actually call him, maybe.

Oh, here is my new theme song!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbwSeiWrLnU&feature=related

Finally got around to calling.

Ok, I did the block my number thing and dialed the fellow up Sunday afternoon.  Has a very nice voice.  I told him of my Beulah connections and he "knew of"  both of them, so at least he is aware of his surroundings.  That is a plus.  He does not "get out much", which rather throws up a red flag in my mind.  How could anyone live in Beulah and not get out much?  Why live there just to stay home?  He has no pets, but that is not unusual in mountain towns since bears and cougars and such will eat them.  I could not connect in my mind just where his home is located, but I got the general idea. 

His name is Allan and he is only 60 years old.  He is a retired engineer, but does do a little work from time to time for several different companies in Denver. 

After a little more chit chat I told him I would be in Beulah probably next week and would meet him for coffee at the Stompin Grouds, if he was not busy.  I did give him my hot mail address and told him I would call him in a few days.  Then I rang off.  No sense appearing eager.

Now, you should know that back on the dating site, my in box is filling up.  I am going to need to take a little time and go through that.  I have several winks and flirts, which I have decided to completely ignore those.  I will just go for the interested ones.  Never did like the flirty part of the dating games.  Now, I do not have time for this stuff every day, so I will get in there later this week and sort it out.

Right now I have nickle auctions on eBay, so I will tend to that.

Have a good one.

Ah, some "Interest", now that is better

I did post the picture of me in my white hat, and guess what!  I had an "I'm Interested."  Now that sounds a little more promising than the wink and flirt crap.  This guy is divorced, financially secure, lives alone, has three kids, is a retired engineer, enjoys cooking, loves to hike in the mountains.  He is a little short at 5'5".  Gotta watch out for the "Little Man Syndrome".  Second husband had that and he was mean.  Do not want that again.  Oh, oh, and get this, he lives up in Beulah!  I love Beulah! 

What does he want in a woman?  Honesty is paramount, healthy, sense of humor, weight to height ratio should be proportional.  Oh, he uses big words.  I like that in a man.  A mark of intelligence. "Someone to  spend quality time with who enjoys long, quiet evenings at home."  " Looks not important, but personality is." 

 Well, alrighty then.  This sounds like a match made in heaven and the fellow is not bad looking at all.  A tad scruffy looking,  maybe just a tad heavy with a receeding hairline, which is no big deal since Male Pattern Baldness runs in my genes.  Oh, wait.  Eyes are brown.  "Eyes of Brown will let you down."  Hmm.

Well let's just take a chance here and see what happens.  Let me poke this "Interested" button here.

Holy Crap!  He must have been setting on the button.  Went to get a cup of coffee and here I already have his phone number.  Ok, I do not normally call any man for any reason, but in this situation I can see where he might be a little eager, so I will just tell him I will call him later.  Do that in an email.  Then when I have some time I will ring him up and we will talk.  Right now I have things to do.

Fill you in later!

I have a wink and 3 flirts waiting for me.

Now remember, my profile picture is still that of a Llama.  A very pretty Llama, but a Llama none the less.  Now I have a wink and 3 flirts waiting for me to do something about.  For those of you who are not savvy to this, it is the equilalent of me walking into a club, sidling up to the bar and looking around.  One guy winks at me?  Do I wink back?  First I will go read his profile. OK, widower, raising his son who is now in college after his mother died in a tragic accident when the child....Never mind.  Wink out of the way.

Now the flirts.  One no picture.  Widower.  1 child.  This is beginning to sound like a broken record here.  OK.  On the two flirts, I am just going to flirt back.  Now I can decide later.  Maybe they just go down the list and flirt with everybody.  Who knows.  What I am going to do is go find my picture and put it up.  I am going to do the one of me that is on the ebay "ME" page.  The one at the AIDS walk with my white hat.  That way my hair does not show and I am pretty well in shadow so I do not look to bad.  Then I will see what happens.  But right now I am busy and do not have time for this man thing.  So I will holler when something shakes loose, so to speak.

I have action on the dating sight.

Alright I have gone online with the picture of a Llama as my profile picture and I have had 3 men who are interested.  I mean really interested.  First guy is a drop dead gorgeous bad boy from Scranton, Pennsylvania.  He is a widower, younger than me, with a 23 year old son.  He lost his wife in a tragic accident when the child was one year old.  How sad.  He realizes that we are far apart, but a few thousand  miles should not matter when two people really care.  Man I could drown in those eyes.  He could move out here.  I own my home, we could be very happy.  Wait a minute!  He is madly in love with a Llama?  No mention of why I do not have an actual picture of myself. 

So on to number 2.  No picture on this one.  He is from Puerto Rico.  Would I send him a plane ticket so he could come and meet  "a very fascinating woman who could possibly replace my dear wife who died an untimely death in a car crash when the child was a mere year old".  Am I getting a little da javu here or what?

And now to number 3 which is one I must quote almost word for word.  For the record, my profile name is Mountain Momma.  Had to be something!  "My very dear Mountain Momma.  When I read your profile I immediately felt a connection to you.  I am a single man who raised his son all alone after my wife who I loved dearly, his mother died a very ugly death in a tragic accident when the boy was one year old.  Please send me airfare so we can meet and talk. I would be happy to pay you back, but I want first to see that you are a sincere woman and not one after my money, of which I have very much."

OK, I can see how this is going.  I think some where in the bowels of a prison somewhere, there is a fat, balding man hunkered down behind a boiler in a basement with a lap top in search of lonely women.  So I reported all three of these jokers to security on the web site.  Now we will see if anything happens.

Kind of disappointed that this is the best they have to offer.  See I thought there would actually be some one out there that might actually want to meet some one to maybe spend a little time with.  Maybe dinner and if I got really lucky, dancing.

But for tonight I think I will not worry about this and wait and see what tomorrow brings.

Well, I had a picture of a pie back there...

For some reason Google and Picassa are conspiring against me.  First there was no pie and now there is no picture of a Llama.  But just use your imagination and picture a Llama there above this paragraph.  They will get it fixed soon.

Alright, this is my profile picture!  Now granted I do sort of need a shave and maybe I do look a little bit long in the tooth, but I tried posting a pie and that did not work.  So we will go with this.  I just put this on match.com or some such site about ten minutes ago.  I do not know how long it takes to "hit the streets", so to speak, but we will be wiser a little later on today, maybe.

Now, I am willing to bet that I can catch a man with this picture.  I could be wrong.  And I did add the sentence "This is not my real picture, nor is it close.  But let me see what kind of response I get and when we meet I will tell you why I did this."

See, you people reading this know what kind of person I am, but these men do not. They will either look at it an immediately dismiss me as a fruitcake, or they will see this as the ploy it is.  Of couse some of them are going to think it is my real picture and some of them will think I must really be a dog to post a picture like that.  At least this will give me something to think about.  And I can buy a little time before I have to actually meet a stranger and try to interact with him.

Ok, today is Friday lunch with Tim day and I got a lot of work to do before then.  So, as soon as I know something, you will know something.  Who knows, I may not get a single hit.  Then my hard earned money will be completely wasted.

Have a good one!

Delilah!!!  If you are out there, please give me a call.  You neglected to give me your new number,  and when did you move?  Is there something I should know?